"Paper or plastic, or really, like, no bag. No bag at all would be much better for the planet, man." "I know, but I really need the bag, really".

Yesterday I got a dirty look from a store clerk for requesting a plastic bag to hold the single small item purchased. I mean, I really did not want to get into a big "green" brouhaha with him, but I had a really good, legitimate reason to request the bag...the reason being, it would have been nearly impossible for me to fantasize about killing him, with proper irony, without that plastic bag to wad up and shove down his throat*.

*note- No actual store clerks were hurt (or threatened) in relation to this epic fictional tale of societal and individual struggle.